just say no

I've decided that resolutions are dumb. Mostly, they just make me feel bad about myself. Of course there are things I want to work on. I just don't think I need to make resolutions about them this year. So I'm just saying no to resolutions in 2013.

what doesn't kill you

I can't say there's much to report from my neck of the woods. Running, violin, reading, teaching. That's about it.

The running club has been such a fun experiment, though. I feel stronger after only two weeks, though I'm trying to be careful not to overdo it. We did 9 miles in intervals tonight, and I was able to hang with some folks I don't think I had any business running with. The coach has it in his head that I could, within the year, run a 3:30 marathon. That's some crazy talk. I am hoping for a 3:45 at Grandmas. And that is pretty ambitious given my TCM disappointment. But, the workout tonight boosted my confidence a little. Time will tell.

My class of 3 students for Young Adult Lit is dreadful. Could not be less excited for that tomorrow night. I changed things up in terms of the plan for how class will go, and fingers crossed it's a little better. I can't spend another 3.5 hours of crickets. Well, it wasn't all crickets. They did talk when they complained about how terrible all the books they read for class were. Cuz, you know, award winning YA books are crap, of course. I'm all for bringing a critical eye to a text, but come on people. You can't find anything redeeming?

On the bright side, aside from the student who called in sick from class because she had eaten too much pizza the night before and hadn't slept well, my Children's Lit class is wonderful. Engaged students and thoughtful discussions. My online class is going fine as well, and my student teachers give me faith in the future.

And as for my resolutions, I'm doing great with 2, 3, and 5. Only made it to the St. Kate's library once, and haven't gone on a date in 2012. Oh, and I'm not doing much writing yet either.

be the match

I'm embarrassed to admit that before this week, I had not done the work to be on the bone marrow donor registry. There is no excuse. I should have done this years ago. No reason I hadn't, just didn't make it a priority to think about it at the right time to fill out the 5 minute questionnaire, donate a little money, and swab my cheeks. Sent off my swabs earlier this week. And then I wait and hope I can help someone one day.

recipe share: barley and butternut squash risotto

After coveting one for over a decade, using the generous gift card I received from my aunt and uncle, I bought a Le Creuset dutch oven for myself. I absolutely love it. And I made a great first meal using it last weekend.

baked barley risotto with butternut squash
serves 4


2 T olive oil
1 small butternut squash (about 1.5 lbs), peeled, seeded, and cut into 1" pieces (about 3 cups)
1 onion, finely chopped
1 cup pearl barley
salt and pepper
1/2 cup dry white wine
3 cups low-sodium veggie broth
5 oz baby spinach
1/2 cup grated parmesan cheese

Heat oven to 400 degrees. Heat the oil in a dutch oven or large oven-safe saucepan over medium-high heat. Add the squash, onion, 1/4 tsp salt, and 1/4 tsp pepper and cook, stirring often, until the onion begins to soften, 4-6 minutes.

Add the barley to the vegetables and cook, stirring, for about 1 minute. Add the wine and cook, stirring, until evaporated, about 1 minute. Add the broth and bring to a boil; cover the pot and transfer to the oven. Bake until barley is tender, 35-40 minutes.

Stir in spinach and parmesan. I don't think it needed the parm, actually. Next time I'll probably leave it out. The recipe also called for a T of butter to be stirred in at the end, but I didn't add it and didn't miss it.

wrinkle in my plan

Just as I am resolved to watch less tv, I become obsessed with not one but TWO shows: Portlandia on IFC and Downton Abbey on PBS.

I watched the first episode of Downton Abbey way back and wasn't gripped. But then everyone I know was raving about it, so when it was being replayed over winter break, I gave it another shot. And fell victim.

I just heard about Portlandia on NPR's Fresh Air this week. Co-writers and co-stars Fred Armisen and Carrie Brownstein were being interviewed, and it sounded hilarious. And there was a marathon of the first season leading up to the second season premiere Friday night. This was one of my favorite sketches. And this one. This was funny too.

Do the shows count as educational since I learned about one show on NPR and the other show is on PBS? #nicetrylady

2012 resolutions

I tend to be a little over ambitious in setting resolutions. This year, I'd like to give more in time and money to people and organizations I care about. I haven't figured out exactly how to do that, but that's a goal of mine for the year. In addition, I have a few more...

1. write more. professionally and personally.

2. watch less tv. most of the time, it's just on for white noise. going to work on trading tv for the radio or becoming ok with silence.

3. start cooking more again. I set this as a resolution two years ago and did great, but then this past year got away from me. I'd like to learn to make a pot roast. And roast a chicken. And how to cook with tofu. I'm recommitting to cooking twice a week. since every recipe I make ends up being three meals anyway, this has me pretty much covered for the week.

4. visit the public library at least once a month.

5. use eye cream every night. I'm not getting any younger, but I don't need to look like it.

6. keep dating. blah. I have almost no faith that there is someone out there for me, but I must have a little since I'm back on match.com.

I think that's a fine list to begin with. Let's hear it for 2012!

how'd I do on my 2011 resolutions?

In 2011, I resolved to have a happy and healthy, skinnier, wealthier, literarier, runnier, datier, classier, kinder year. How'd I do?

1. Lose dissertation weight: lost 10 pounds. not quite all the weight, but I'm close. considering that I whined far harder about this than I actually practiced moderation, I'm happy I lost the ten!

2. Start saving money: got signed up for and started paying into my work retirement plan.

3. Submit 2 manuscripts for publication: one is under review. another is near submission. waiting on my adviser. what else is new?

4. Read more for pleasure: didn't do so well here. so this one is staying on the list

5. Run another marathon: done. ran 1000 miles in 2011. not sure if I want to up the ante on that for 2012, but maybe I'll go for a repeat.

6. Get my butt in gear and start dating again: did it. and much to my dismay, the depression of the holidays convinced me to reactivate with match.com. I'm not going to meet anyone living my normal life, so I have to do something.

7. Go to orchestra concerts when I don't know any of the music: did not do this. has to stay on the list.

8. Continue to work on my relationship with my mom: I don't think this one will ever be done, so I can't check this one off.

9. Oh, and take my vitamins every day: did this one. check!

10. Go somewhere: Greece, baby.

So not so bad. I also weened myself off sugar in my coffee, which was no easy feat since I took splenda, as regular sugar was not sweet enough. And I have cut down my reality tv watching - no more real housewives of wherever or top chef or sing-off. I still watch project runway and so you think you can dance. but in terms of reality, pretty harmless I think.

Now I have to think of my 2012 resolutions. Something about cooking more, visiting the public library more, and turning off the tv more. I'm settling on them and will get back to you tomorrow or so!

resolution check in: month three

Is it already that time again?

Resolution 1: Lose dissertation weight.
How am I doing? Awful. But resolute to begin again.

Resolution 2: Start saving money.
How am I doing? Budget is working well. I have enough saved for new garage doors and should have enough for the siding by the end of the month. I found out that I can't start investing in the college's retirement plan until next year, so I'm not thinking about that yet.

Resolution 3: Submit 2 manuscripts for publication.
How am I doing? Writing papers for presentations has taken precedence this month. But it's close on my radar.

Resolution 4: Read more for pleasure.
How am I doing? I'm doing ok here, all things considered. Haven't read much that I've loved, but I'm reading.

Resolution 5: Run another marathon.
How am I doing? Signed up and training plan started.

Resolution 6: Start dating again.
How am I doing? Not doing.

Resolution 7: Attend concerts where I don't know the music.
How am I doing? Still haven't done this. I haven't been to any concerts where I know the music either though. I have to have free time to do this. And I don't right now.

Resolution 8: Work on relationship with mom.
How am I doing? This has been going well. I snapped at my mom once while working on my taxes, but I'm forgiving myself for that one.

Resolution 9: Take vitamins.
How am I doing? I'm taking this off my list, since I've done just fine with this since the new year.

Resolution 10: Take a vacation.
How am I doing? Planned and (almost) booked. Headed to Athens, Greece in July.

Not too bad. But needing to focus a bit as spring is here.

resolution check in: month two

Let's just pretend February didn't happen, ok?

Honestly, I made some good progress in some areas, where others (um, weight loss, publications, dating) were a big abyss of nothingness this month.

Tomorrow is a new day, though. Right?

resolution check in: month one

I think I better check in regularly to see how I'm doing on my resolutions. That way, I'm more likely to keep on top of them.

Resolution 1: Lose dissertation weight.
How am I doing? I've lost 4 lbs so far, which seems about right at the slow pace of a pound a week. I think I could lose more than that, but want to be realistic. This was very slow to get started, and then just recently I started seeing a difference in how clothes were fitting/the number on the scale. Still have 9 to go.

Resolution 2: Start saving money.
How am I doing? I have made a new budget and stuck to it this month. I am saving for some things in particular (a trip, new siding and doors for the garage, new flooring in the house), and I have been pleased with the plan this month.

Resolution 3: Submit 2 manuscripts for publication.
How am I doing? I made some good progress toward this right after break. And then it got dropped. I need to get on that this weekend.

Resolution 4: Read more for pleasure.
How am I doing? I have finished couple books, but then I needed to concentrate on reading the texts for the insane FOUR classes I'm teaching this term. Hoping to carve out more time though.

Resolution 5: Run another marathon.
How am I doing? Signing up for TCM on Wednesday. Bring it!

Resolution 6: Start dating again.
How am I doing? I got back on match.com, and have gone on one date so far. Though this might seem like not much progress, I consider it a big deal. Especially considering my aversion to first dates.

Resolution 7: Attend concerts where I don't know the music.
How am I doing? Poor. Need to do something about this one.

Resolution 8: Work on relationship with mom.
How am I doing? Well, I have been really working on this one. I did get unnecessarily impatient with mom this weekend at the movie, but otherwise, we've had really good phone conversations all month. Baby steps.

Resolution 9: Take vitamins.
How am I doing? Great. Taken every day. Though this feels like a cheater resolution, because it is so easy. But at least I can say I've accomplished one well so far.

Resolution 10: Take a vacation.
How am I doing? This is in the works. It's still a sapling of an idea, but that means it is more than just a seed! I'll dish when it gets more concrete.

Not bad.

little white lies

Is it ever ok to lie?

I ask because, I admit, I do it from time to time. Like, "I'm sick" when I just needed a mental health excuse out of something. Or, "I have a boyfriend" to the skeezy guy at the bar. Or, "That has happened to me too" to the friend needing someone to commiserate over whatever it is that needs commiserating. Or, "I had a great weekend" when I really did nothing but watch tv. It's easier this way. For me, that is.

This, I also admit, does not help me on my quest to be more impeccable with my words. I suppose these seemingly harmless lies could, in fact, not be harmless. I'm feeling more and more like these little white lies are a problem, however infrequent.

I guess I should add that to my resolutions. Little White Lie less.

resolutions

I don't usually make resolutions at New Year's. I find that it is a difficult time in the year to make changes. Typically, I make resolutions at the end of the school year so that I have the summer to work on them. However, I haven't made any resolutions the last three years because summer hasn't meant a whole lot since I've worked like crazy during them.

Anyway, I think now is the time, and some of my resolutions need to begin as soon as possible. Here they are:

1. Lose the rest of this freaking dissertation weight. No it is not much, but I hate it and actually want to be (have to be) committed to it. Now. Seriously. It might mean moving, as I love the cookies at the coffee shop at the corner. Just a stroll away. Especially the ginger cookies. Crisp on the edges and a little gooey in the middle. Ok enough. Lose weight now!

2. Start saving money. Now that I have a regular (above poverty line) income, it is time to think about my retirement fund again. Not that I'll ever have enough money to retire, but one can dream I suppose.

3. Submit 2 manuscripts for publication. I have one almost ready to go, and I'll be working on the other starting Monday.

4. Read more for pleasure. Yesterday's list indicates that I didn't do very well on this in the last year. I teach reading, for pete's sake. I have to be a good reader.

5. Run another marathon. I want to drop some time from my first marathon, so I think I'll need to change up my training. Maybe do some speed/interval workouts and such. I don't know what that means yet, but I'll figure that out.

6. Get my butt in gear and start dating again. I've had about a six month drought in that arena, and I haven't done a darn thing to remedy it. I now know that I can't meet someone while laying on my couch watching Glee. Who knew? So, I plan to do some work to get out there again.

7. Go to orchestra concerts when I don't know any of the music. I tend to select concerts to hear my favorites, though when I go hear new (or new to me) music, I am usually happily surprised. Need to shove myself out of the box a little.

8. Continue to work on my relationship with my mom. Ever the project. Mostly this boils down to (my own) increased patience and acceptance. Should be easy.

9. Oh, and take my vitamins every day. It's not hard. Why haven't I been doing it the last few months? No excuses. Remember to take them!

10. Go somewhere. And not to visit relatives. I love my relatives, but I want a legit vaca in 2011.

Here's to a happy and healthy, skinnier, wealthier, literarier, runnier, datier, classier, kinder 2011.