Bridget pulls through again

I'm giving the keynote address at a conference next Friday. I've been thinking about this talk since late August when I was asked. But I haven't exactly written it. I'm working on it this weekend, and needed to channel my dissertation writing mojo - you know, what helped me write and revise 400 pages in 6 weeks. I decided I needed a little Bridget Jones to help me get focused and working. Once again, whatever it is about that movie, I got to work and have my slides completed. Can't say the talk is completely finished, but I'm a heck of a lot farther than I was before I popped the DVD into the player.

face for radio

A few weeks ago, I hosted my nerdy work book club. We read Racial Innocence: Performing American Childhood from Slavery to Civil Rights by Robin Bernstein. Reading the book in prep for the meeting (I'll admit I didn't read the entire book), I felt like I was back in grad school in a Culture and Teaching course. I always enjoy the interesting and intelligent conversations we have at these meetings.

It was a sparsely attended meeting, just me and two others. One of those in attendance was brand new to the group, a prof at a local community college. She was super cool, and I was happy to have her energy join our fun group. A few days after the meeting, she asked if I would be a guest on a radio show she hosts, the theme of the evening being "Censorship and Controversy in Young Adult Literature," and I decided it would be an interesting experience so I said yes.

The interview was last night. I was super nervous for it, since I've never done anything like it. A friend of mine who hosts a show on WCCO how to prep and her big advice was not to eat dairy that day (causes mucous build-up in the throat. who knew?). So I stayed away from milk, yogurt, and cheese (three big staples in my diet) to be less mucousy. Charlotte asked awesome questions and the authors on with me were amazing. It was fun. Not the kind of fun I need to do all the time, but it was a great experience. You can read about/listen to it here.

And you should read the books by the authors that were on, especially Molly Beth Griffin's beautiful book Silhouette of a Sparrow, a love story between two women set in Excelsior, MN in the 1920s. It's a stunning novel (and I kinda hate her since it was her graduate school final project).

the edge of glory

Official back-to-school workshops started today. Most of the day was scheduled work time. I was super productive and crossed a ton off my to-do list. Plus, someone actually posted a comment on my work blog, so I have actual reader(s). I'm taking all this as a good omen for the year.

please remind me in september

I always forget how overwhelming it is to start a new semester. I appreciate the change, knowing that lots of people don't get this opportunity in their jobs. But it is so much damn work.

It's usually better about 4 weeks in, but until then, I feel like I'm drowning in a pile of books, papers, meetings, articles, planning, writing, books, meetings...

I think that after this week, I'll be coming out from under the piles. I just need to remember in the fall when I'm stressed that it'll be ok in a few weeks. I think I can...

wonderful, counselor

A lifetime ago, I played in the orchestra for my college's performance of Handel's Messiah every December.

Here's an awesome pic of Weston Noble rehearsing the Messiah choir some time in the 50s.




When a friend sent me the link to this Hallelujah chorus flash mob, I cried through the whole thing and decided I needed to see a performance this year.

I googled "Messiah, December 2010, Minneapolis" and the first link was to the MN Orchestra. Wow, I thought, I'd love to see the MN Orch perform Messiah. I went to their web page, only to discover that the cheapest tickets were $95. Up to $250. Yikes. I wanted to see the show, but that was a lot of money right before Christmas. Sad, I decided to forgo it this year. Maybe I could plan ahead and go next year.

Then, lo and behold, I got an email that there was going to be a performance at St. Kate's. In the chapel, on a night I could go. For a $15 donation. Sold. Another reason to be glad I work at SCU.

It was a beautiful night. MacPhail teamed with Sonomento for a traditional baroque version (i.e. smaller choir and orchestra, the way it was written). Apparently as it grew in popularity, so to did the sizes of the choirs and orchestras performing it.

Here's a peak at the huge Luther Messiah chorus. (I swear I see people I know in this, even though I just pulled it randomly from Luther's flikr site, and there was no year attached. Wishful viewing, or am I right??)


So, last night's performance was a bit different from the massive crew at Luther, but wonderful nonetheless. I may not be very religious as of late, but that last amen gets me like nothing else.

(on a side note, I hate that people seem to make it a contest to see who can clap first at the end of a performance. some of my fondest memories at Luther are the seconds after the last "amen," just hanging in the air. so people, wait a second or two. it'll be worth it. you aren't to clap until the conductor lowers his/her arms, at the very least.)

I think the people sitting around me wondered what my deal was, as I had tears streaming down my cheeks for a good part of it. I don't know what my problem is but as I get older, music has a way of blindsiding me with emotion. I guess it's kind of ridiculous and a little embarrassing, but I don't actually care. And really, how can you not. Handel wrote this magnificent piece in 24 days. Seriously? 24 days? Crazy. And some of the most beautiful and well-known choral works ever. Amazing.

thrown for a loop

One of the things that I love about teaching children's lit is when I create the opportunity for students to rethink books that they have always loved using new lenses of critique. Students are often ready to storm out of class when I tell then that The Rainbow Fish is a terrible story for children. And when I launch in on The Giving Tree, they are near revolt.

But I'm not apologizing. If I can get them to rethink books, even if they end up disagreeing with me, I have done something. With so many books with truly great messages to read to children, there is no need to laud books that teach children to give up what makes them unique or that to love unconditionally means to give up your life.

awkwardness (almost) averted

Thursday and Friday of this week was the MACTE (MN Association of Colleges of Teacher Education) Conference. It's an organization I was peripherally involved in during my PhD work, but was just a lowly grad student, so only made a couple presentations and that's about it. Now that I'm officially part of the teacher prep community, I'm a fully acknowledged member of the group.

I taught Thursday morning, and so joined the meetings after lunch. I was mingling in the hallway before the first afternoon session when an SCU coworker came up to me saying, "I had the most uncomfortable encounter this morning.

Me: "What happened?"

Susan: "When I got into the meeting this morning, a woman who we interviewed for your job, who obviously didn't get it, came up to me and asked, 'Why didn't I get the job?' I was so surprised, I didn't know how to respond." We talked about how unprofessional and awkward that was, and went to our respective break-out sessions.

I walk into the St. Croix Room and almost literally run into three of the people from the Gustavus search committee. The job I didn't get. Ha. To her credit, one of the women came over to me to ask what I was doing now and to tell me that they loved me and it was a really hard decision, and that she was really glad I am still in MN and got a job in teacher prep. I thanked her and said that it was a great interview at Gustavus, and that I really liked it there, but that I was very happy with my position and everything worked out for me. It was very nice of her to diffuse a potentially awkward situation.

And it saved me from having to confront someone about not getting the job.

:)

fooling myself

I think the only way I survived last year was to tell myself that it would be so much better this year. That once I was done with the dissertation I would get my life back.

Ha.

It is better, it is. But I really shouldn't be working a part time job on top of my college prof gig. I love that I have one foot in the classroom, and I don't want to lose that. I think I'm doing a pretty good job at both jobs, and my mid-term evals were really positive. But...

I am so burned out. Exhausted. Out of steam. My pace last year and over the summer was bound to catch up to me. And it has. Big time. So even though I'm working slightly more reasonable hours, I just don't feel present.

I need to rejuvenate. Trying to figure out how to band-aid the situation until winter break, when I plan to sleep from Christmas to New Years. Screw family visitors and planning for my new class starting 1/3. I'll need to nap.

oh, blueberries!

One of the best parts of my job is that I get to observe practicum placements in elementary schools. This gets me in 10 classrooms grades K-6, and I get to see what great teachers do with these awesome kiddos. And it is so fun to get to observe and provide feedback to those just learning.

Yesterday I was sitting in a Montessori classroom with first, second, and third graders. One of the children turned around to me, sitting in the back, and tapped my leg several times. "Excuse me. Excuse me." I asked her what I could help her with. "I don't know this word. It's hard. Can you help me?" I asked her to identify the first letter, and from there, with the help of the corresponding picture, she figured it out. Exasperated, she threw up her hands, "Oh! Blueberries! Of course. I love blueberries." And she grabbed her blue crayon and happily continued her work.

So cute. I miss the kids, but love what I'm doing.

under piles

This new job thing is kicking my butt.

So exciting and wonderful, but so much to do.

I was going to write last night, but decided to spend an hour at pilates instead. I realized I haven't taken a breath in a week or so. I still haven't even written about my fantastic party yet. It was only a week and a half ago, but it seems like ages have passed in the interim.

I'll have a better handle soon. Soon. I keep saying that, but this time I really believe it.

welcome, indeed

The Tuesday of opening workshop week around St. Kate's is known as "Sister Andrea's Day." Sister Andrea, President of SCU, always plans something over-the-top to welcome faculty and staff back for a new academic year. All offices are closed, and everyone attends the morning celebration. In the past, there has been video, bands, light shows, comedy, dancing, singing, you name it. I think there was a fog machine one year.

In the afternoon, there are follow-up talks by the VP and Deans of Students and such, all helping flesh out the mission and vision that Sister Andrea creatively charges the faculty and staff with in the morning.

No one ever knows what is going to happen except for Sister Andrea and the very, very elite few she entrusts with planning with her.

This year, the schedule said that the President's Address was from 9-12 and from 1-4. Six hours of the President. Sitting in O'Shaughnessy. There isn't a lot that can keep me from getting antsy or sleepy in an auditorium for 6 hours. I had been told that the opening celebration was amazing and so unique to St. Kate's, so I kept an open mind.

Boy, were we in for a surprise.

The opening was a lot of rah-rah look what we accomplished last year, and yay-yay here's where we're headed. Sister Andrea talked about "the Year of the Liberal Arts," the focus for this academic year. She had chosen two patron saints for us for the year, and described them a bit (a Cuban priest that I've forgotten his name already, and Lillian Gilbreth). She ended her talk with the strategic plan for SCU, which includes a lot about our visibility and perceptions of SCU. And as much as people hate the term, the branding of St. Kate's. That in a way, we're a business that needs to make sure that we're putting out a vision that we are proud of, and that the way SCU is perceived is how we want to be perceived. That a lot of that has to do with marketing and advertising. It was interesting, but pretty low-key.

And then she went on to say that we were going to get started today, and sent us all to the MN State Fair for the day. In our bright purple St. Kate's t-shirts and hats. To eat, and laugh, and mingle, and advertise. And have fun as a St. Kate's community in the wider community.

Everyone was shocked. We climbed aboard big buses and received an envelope with an entrance ticket, $10 in food vouchers, and a map. We headed to the fair and were let loose. We chatted with tons of people - lots who had gone to St. Kate's, and a few that were considering it. With five hundred of us - yes, that was 500 faculty and staff members, everywhere we turned, we could see a group in purple. It was so much fun.

Here's to a great year.

inspiration

Yesterday, I learned more about the mission and vision of my new workplace, as well as what it means to be a women's college at the heart and a university grounded in the liberal arts and infused with the Catholic identity.

I learned that SCU:

- is the largest women's college/university in the country

- has the highest percentage of racially/ethnically diverse students of any private college in the state

- was the first Catholic institution recognized by Phi Beta Kappa

I have to admit that there were aspects to being a Catholic institution that scared me a little. Though raised a Catholic, I've been a bit lapsed lately. In between stress about grad school and the job search, I've struggle with my anger at the church in so many ways. However, I think that if the Catholic church had listened to Sister Amata Miller, IHM, PhD today talk about what it meant to be Catholic as it pertains to higher education, the church might not have people leaving in droves. Seriously, after listening to her, I was inspired enough to consider attending mass again at the university. Who can argue with the core principles of human dignity, of caring for dear neighbors without distinction, of reaching out to the poor and marginalized, of commitment to faith AND reason, of the dignity of work - all work, of the rights AND responsibilities of justice, of deep connection to community. And where her description differed from the opinion of many in the church: welcoming of all people - no matter what.

Sister Amata may have been a bit deceiving in looks, at 70+ years of age, but she was awesome. Back in the day, straight out of the noviciate (I think this means novice nun), she went to Berkeley to get her PhD in economics. Imagine being a Catholic nun trying to get a PhD in economics in the '60s at uber-liberal Berkeley. Having to defend her faith as well as her place as an intellectual peer at every turn in a degree program dominated by men. Awesome.

I am loving that I get to work in a place that inspires me this much.

I know that it will at times be frustrating and stressful, but don't burst my happy bubble yet.

let's get it started

I'm an assistant professor.

This has been a very weird adjustment to make. I'm having a little trouble getting used to this new identity. As friends joke, I just need leather patches on my tweed jacket and a pipe and I'll be all set.

Though I've had some meetings and work, today begins new faculty workshops, the real start to my new position. I'm excited and nervous and ultimately really ready for a new adventure. Even if I feel like throwing up.

office

I'm all official:




This is my office. It looks a little barren, but I think it will be a great place to work. The curtains I made from fabric bought at Mood. I didn't want to cut the fabric, just in case I don't stay in the office or I find something else I'd rather do with it, so the curtain is more like a simple block of fabric, but I think it adds a little brightness to the sterile white.




The view from my desk. Note Yo-Yo Ma with Goodnight Moon:





Book shelves! Left side is for professional resources, right side houses children's and YA books.




In my very first classroom as a teacher, I had a parent who made the storycloth below. I've always hung it in my classroom, but have always wanted it framed. I splurged this spring as a present to myself for getting the job, and it hangs in my office. I love it. It is the only thing I love about my first job, but it's a good thing to love.




This was a fantastic aspect to the office - a big storage closet. Big enough for file cabinets and then some. It will one day be the home of a coffee maker, and possibly a mini-fridge. Too many expenses this summer and no paychecks coming in, so I'll have to wait on that until I start making a salary.



I'm still not exactly sure what to do with this funny little storage closet. The shelves are built in, and not tall enough to house books standing up. I have no idea what the original intent for this space was, but I need to figure out the best way to maximize the space.




So that's it. Let the work begin!